I don't understand sometimes....
I have a mix of emotions these days. Some happy, some funny, some sad, some frustrated, some annnoyed, and some just bla! And I am so tired. But I know God is working...it is just hard to sit still sometimes and listen to Him or even to not ask "WHY" sometimes.
Another teenager died from around here yesterday. During church actually. We called his steo-mom to let her hear our prayers for him and he passed away. I got the calls from his step-mom late Saturday night because I was babysitting and she kept calling trying to get in touch with Liz, whose house I was at. It was sad. He just turned 15 and has been batteling with cancer for a long time. Even though it is good that he is not suffereing now and we can rejoice that he is finally HOME, it is still sad. I look at the majority of my youth, which are 15 year olds, and I get so sad. They are so precious. I would hate to lose one of them. Which is my emotions of sadness, and frustration. Things at church have been better, but again last night I felt like I was slapped in the face. I am sad about leaving here soon, but then moments like last night and I can't wait to leave. But on the other hand, we had a really good youth service where two of my girls opened up about the fear of loosing their mom soon. That broke my heart. And then one of my dearest friends here in Tuscaloosa is leaving me. I am SO excited about the opportunity before him. It would be so stupid of him not to take it...and he needs to get away, but selfishly I want him here to be my friend and my support and encourager in my church. I feel as though I am about to loose a dear friend. That is sad. But that is life. And then I have this other friend who I SO long to hear from and I try to communicate with him, but he just doesn't respond. Or if he does, it's at random times and weird. I struggle with what he is to be in my life. It's hard.
My computer keeps acting up. Maybe that is my sign for QUITE WHINNING!!! It's just one of those days. ...sorry. And i am procrastinating from doing school work. I have a lot of that this week and I just can't get motivated to start on it!
On to the good things...and feelings.
~I got a raise at church...NOT much, but these days anything helps.
~I have decided for sure to apply to Seminary and am starting that process slowly but surely.
~I was encouraged by Amy and Laura's last post! One from Amy's, that I need to not be so selfish and from Laura's that God is listening!!! I also enjoyed Les's story of your and Amy's adventure!
~I get to see Shane and Shane in concert this week!
I've got a bobo story that was pretty funny (at least if you were there)...we are taking church directory pictures this week and yesterday I was helping with that. They are in the gym and I wanted a water out of the coke machine. There are two machines next to each other. So, i put my dollar in one machine and pushed water, but of course it was sold out. So, i pushed coin return so I could get my $ and put it in the other machine for a diet coke. Well, instead of giving me 4 quarters, the machine decided to give me a dollar in NICKELS!! The gym was packed with people from the church and here i am at the coke machine that won't stop spitting coins at me!! It sounded like I just won the lottery!! Oh how I wish I had instead of a dollar in quarters!! Everyone laughed.... BOBO coke machine!
Well, my thoughts are jumbled and not coming out well and I need to get on to my school work. I just needed to write a minute...to clear my head.
I hope you are all well. I will see some of you soon. We need to have another weekend together soon.
Love ya'll!
Another teenager died from around here yesterday. During church actually. We called his steo-mom to let her hear our prayers for him and he passed away. I got the calls from his step-mom late Saturday night because I was babysitting and she kept calling trying to get in touch with Liz, whose house I was at. It was sad. He just turned 15 and has been batteling with cancer for a long time. Even though it is good that he is not suffereing now and we can rejoice that he is finally HOME, it is still sad. I look at the majority of my youth, which are 15 year olds, and I get so sad. They are so precious. I would hate to lose one of them. Which is my emotions of sadness, and frustration. Things at church have been better, but again last night I felt like I was slapped in the face. I am sad about leaving here soon, but then moments like last night and I can't wait to leave. But on the other hand, we had a really good youth service where two of my girls opened up about the fear of loosing their mom soon. That broke my heart. And then one of my dearest friends here in Tuscaloosa is leaving me. I am SO excited about the opportunity before him. It would be so stupid of him not to take it...and he needs to get away, but selfishly I want him here to be my friend and my support and encourager in my church. I feel as though I am about to loose a dear friend. That is sad. But that is life. And then I have this other friend who I SO long to hear from and I try to communicate with him, but he just doesn't respond. Or if he does, it's at random times and weird. I struggle with what he is to be in my life. It's hard.
My computer keeps acting up. Maybe that is my sign for QUITE WHINNING!!! It's just one of those days. ...sorry. And i am procrastinating from doing school work. I have a lot of that this week and I just can't get motivated to start on it!
On to the good things...and feelings.
~I got a raise at church...NOT much, but these days anything helps.
~I have decided for sure to apply to Seminary and am starting that process slowly but surely.
~I was encouraged by Amy and Laura's last post! One from Amy's, that I need to not be so selfish and from Laura's that God is listening!!! I also enjoyed Les's story of your and Amy's adventure!
~I get to see Shane and Shane in concert this week!
I've got a bobo story that was pretty funny (at least if you were there)...we are taking church directory pictures this week and yesterday I was helping with that. They are in the gym and I wanted a water out of the coke machine. There are two machines next to each other. So, i put my dollar in one machine and pushed water, but of course it was sold out. So, i pushed coin return so I could get my $ and put it in the other machine for a diet coke. Well, instead of giving me 4 quarters, the machine decided to give me a dollar in NICKELS!! The gym was packed with people from the church and here i am at the coke machine that won't stop spitting coins at me!! It sounded like I just won the lottery!! Oh how I wish I had instead of a dollar in quarters!! Everyone laughed.... BOBO coke machine!
Well, my thoughts are jumbled and not coming out well and I need to get on to my school work. I just needed to write a minute...to clear my head.
I hope you are all well. I will see some of you soon. We need to have another weekend together soon.
Love ya'll!
posted by JOY at 11:50 AM
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